Today marked another cancer checkup with a skin screening at my dermatologist. The past week has been filled with anxious thoughts mixed with whispered prayers for God’s strength and protection. I know that God is able and that He is allowing me to walk this path for some reason that I may or may not ever know.

And as I suspected, I did not receive encouraging news. I have not allowed myself to really show emotion, I have tried to keep myself busy and focus on other things. To give a little perspective in 2015 when I had my surgery to remove the spot of Melanoma, at the follow up doctor appointments the doctors always closely checked my scar for any signs that color was returning and up till today it’s been good. Today, the dermatologist let me know that a dark spot has returned. 😥 This is not a definite sign that the cancer has returned, but she let on that she was very concerned. I recently had either a spot of acne or a boil come up either right on the scar or smack dab under it and it was super painful. Doc let me know that she wants to know immediately if that happens again.

They did chuckle at me, but had to reprimand me too, I had used the pedicure set that I got for Christmas on a black spot that was not symmetrical on the bottom of my foot (please don’t do that if that happens to you) instead of waiting to show it to my doctor. So, from now on, no more filing off any funny looking spots before doc sees them.

I have to return to see her in 3 months now instead of 6. As I have another condition that she’s monitoring closely as well. Am I discouraged, not in my Christian walk no, but in my health walk yes. It’s been 1 1/2 years of clean, good reports so at least I’ve had that long! And who knows maybe this will be nothing as well.

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